Identifying fear-based behavior is a necessary step toward choosing healthier action. That is my motivation for sharing this very personal, yet not-all-that unique part of myself with you.
The ultimate challenge
I've been composing this post for weeks, trying to align editing with the fleeting moments of hope and positivity. Truth be told, I have been having pretty wild swings between the milliseconds of hope for running another 50 miler and losing sight of all joy and purpose. Today, I enter week seven of no running… Continue reading The ultimate challenge
Constraint Necessity Pain
"When fishermen can't go to sea, they repair the nets. Let the constraints of the time serve you in righting your relationship to your Self. Be mindful that rectification must come before progress. And as always, consider the uses of adversity."
Reject what you’ve been taught
Whether you use these specific resources or not, the main thing I want you to know is that pain is a great indicator that you need to pay attention, but it doesn't always mean that you have to give up. You just have to work for it. No one can just run free without pain or injury if they don't do the work to keep their body balanced and maintained.
Growth before the sweet release of death
Did you ever hear the phrase "exquisite pain" and be like wtf does that even mean? Me too. This phrase has always baffled me. Like most things I don't fully understand, I'm drawn to exploring it deeper.
Why are you doing it, then?
"Will you win?" This was the question my 7 year old niece asked when I told her about an upcoming race. Upon answering with a definitive "no", she inquired further, "why are you doing it, then?" Why, indeed. I do it for emotional stability, physical health, to connect with nature, to work towards a goal,… Continue reading Why are you doing it, then?
Do you have any races coming up?
I'm not ready because I wore my body down little by little with every race after which I did not allow space for recovery. I'm not ready because I refused to miss an opportunity to take advantage of the warm, beautiful weather. I'm not ready because I never go to bed early enough for the 3:30 am wake up calls, and the sleep deprivation is compounding. I am not ready because I am depleted. Every run seems to feel more fatigued than the last, to the detriment of my attitude, my enjoyment and the quality of my company for those I run with. I am tired of feeling slow and weak. I am tired of tripping and falling on the trail. The only way to correct these things is not to push harder, but to pull back.
Real talk, and I don’t mean that hilarious R. Kelly video*
Like stress, a certain level of comparison is healthy, but go a hair beyond that and it quickly turns toxic. Comparison used as a tool to assign value is the real culprit.
That time I ran 50 miles
So – what happens after mile 30? Does a secret door open up to a magical universe where fairies ride on the tips of unicorn horns, the secrets of life whispering forth from the flap, flap, flap of their wings? Nope. It was pretty much just more running and more pain and more joy.
What goes up…
...the goal has been achieved and no matter where you sit, some pointy rock edge is jamming you in the ass - it gets cold and windy and chances are a storm will roll in before too long. Before the journey down the mountain is even over, you find yourself already craving another and reminiscing about the journey up, almost wishing you were still headed in that direction.